(See Video Below) Last November, Josh and I had to sit our 5 kids down and reveal to them that Mommy had a baby in her belly that had passed away. We had chosen to keep the baby a secret until after my first appointment, because anyone who has kids knows that a life-changing secret such as this would be nearly impossible for them to keep to themselves. 🙂 However, they had a very hard time processing new life and also death in the same day. They were very sad. Waiting the days for my body to miscarry was not fun and I knew very little of what to expect. I told the Lord that I would bless Him whether He gives or takes away. My kids told me that they wanted me to tell them right away “next time”. I told them that “next time” may never come. After all, God had not chosen to give us a baby for the past 7 years and we may never have anymore. I told them how much I thank God for the ones we already have and will trust Him with the future.
Several days ago, surprise, surprise! I found out I was pregnant again. A host of emotions flooded over me. I could only laugh. I laughed with joy and thanked God for this blessing. I also prayed. Prayed that this pregnancy would be healthy and that this baby would survive. Josh and I are both shocked, excited, concerned and nervous all at once. We naturally wanted to keep this a secret for longer so we can make sure all is going well. However, I promised my kids that we would tell them right away…and to tell my kids is to basically make it public. Haha!
We are very thankful because we serve a God who is good no matter what happens in life. Through our lifetime of ups and downs, He has been our steady Anchor – He has remained faithful. Please pray with us that this pregnancy would go well and that come November, we will all be able to hold our new healthy baby in our arms.
UPDATE as of Nov 2022: Sadly, not too long after writing the above blog post, we experienced our second miscarriage in a row. We are coming up on one year since my first pregnancy and also coming up on the due date of my second pregnancy. When I am tempted to dwell on the sadness, I just try to remind myself to be thankful to the Lord for the 5 kids on earth and the 2 sweet kids in Heaven that He has given to us. Miscarrying a baby is very emotional. It’s painful physically and mentally as well. My heart goes out to so many others who have had to endure this sadness. Thank you, Lord, for being good even in the midst of pain and heartache.
~ The McGee Fam’